Easing Separation Anxiety Useful Strategies For parents and children starting child care for the first time separation anxiety is common. For many children, child care is their first experience of extended separation from their parents and for many parents the guilt they have about leaving their child can make the first few days of child care an emotional time. Child care providers can do a lot to decrease the anxiety felt by both children and parents through helping families prepare for the separation before it happens. The best way to help families through the initial period of change is to provide lots of information and support about the normal transition process children go through as they become accustomed to care. This process should start as soon as possible: Before Starting Care When a family secures a position in your service encourage them to come in for a visit as soon as possible. Give the family a tour and encourage the child to play with the other children while the parent watches. Suggest that the parent brings the child in for supervised visits as often as possible in the weeks leading up the start date. On one of these visits show the child where they will sleep, eat and go to the toilet. Show the child the inside and outside play areas and introduce the family to the carers During the preliminary visits and as the child becomes familiar with the environment ask the parent to stay out of sight and encourage the child to interact with the other children. Encourage the parent to provide any information about the child which will help them settle in, consider asking about sleeping/eating habits, likes/dislikes and favourite toys/comforters which will help the transition. Have daily chats about the change and read the child a book about starting care - Playtime Hometime is one such book worth considering. The First Few Days Advise the parent that it is perfectly normal for the child to be teary and emotional on the first few drop-offs. Encourage the parents to adopt a calm, positive attitude to the drop off. Children have a remarkable ability for sensing the mood of their parents and ensuring the parents maintain a façade of confidence will instill confidence in the child. Recommend that the parent says a quick good bye with a kiss and cuddle and that they then leave. Prolonged farewells or parents who linger will draw out the tears from the child. Discourage parents from sneaking out as this will make the child mistrustful and more clingy the next day. Once the parents have said good bye take the child's hand and engage them in an interesting activity. Remember to keep the child informed about the routine of your service and what happens next. Children find comfort in familiarity and knowing what happens when and where will help the child settle in more quickly. Answer any questions the child may have about where their mum/dad is, but quickly distract the child once the question has been answered so the child doesn't have the opportunity to dwell on the answer and become upset. If possible, suggest that the parents pick up the child early for the first few days. For children new to group care it can be extremely tiring and shorter days will help the child adjust more quickly. Remind the parent to call during the day if they feel concerned and take the time to talk to them about how the child is doing. Provide the parents with a detailed summary of how the child's first day went. Talk about how long the child slept, what they ate, how many nappy changes there were, which children they played with, which activities they enjoyed and so on. If you have any pictures of the child from the day make sure you share them with the parents. This will greatly relieve any anxiety the parents may be feeling. Advise the parents to talk positively and confidently about child care with their child at home, encourage them to validate the child's feeling while continuing to explain why child care is necessary. Some children adapt more quickly to child care than others and the transition period will depend on factors such as the child's age, stage of development, previous experiences with other carers, the child care environment and the level of preparation undertaken by the parents. Working with the parents during the initial transition will greatly assist you as you welcome new children to your service. If you have any comments about this article or if you would like to share your strategies for helping new children adjust to child care please go to CareforKids.com.au Social.

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