Mother Guilt will always be a major factor in any mother's return to work. It's a nightmare. You feel terrible. You beat yourself up for making the decision to leave your child. Are you going back too soon? Will it affect your child's confidence, development, happiness, trust… the list goes on.
Most mums get over this in a matter of weeks although of course you get thrown right back to the beginning on the odd day when your child is sick, tired or doesn't want to go to child care for any other reason.
And it's not just working mums who suffer. There are also many kids who go to child care part time to give mum a break and to get them used to being with other children, being in a different, more structured environment, learn social skills and routines. Many women struggle even more when they are at home and have dropped their kids in at child care.
NEWSFLASH. It's OK. Your child is OK. You deserve some time out and now a study in the USA says that day care might actually reduce the risk of emotional problems in some children. Well at least it might for children who are more at risk of developing emotional problems.
The researchers focused on the children of mums suffering symptoms of depression, but then show us a mum who hasn't felt like she might be on the verge of depression at some point or other.
Even if it's not depression, it could be general busyness, work-related stress, career frustration, family issues, relationship stress, physical exhaustion, mental exhaustion…the list goes on. There are a whole host of reasons why a mum might not be the best person to be around at one point or other. They say that babies can sense stress in their mums even before their mums register their own stress.
So it's hardly rocket science to see that removing a child from a stressful situation and putting him or her in a safe and secure environment like child care to hang out with other children is no bad thing.
Apparently children in the USA studies showed less separation anxiety, social withdrawal, and fewer emotional problems in general.
It's early socialising in a safe place. They are stimulated and encouraged to try things. They eat together, play together, learn to share and communicate. What could be bad about that as long as when they get home they feel loved and secure with their parent as well?
And mum gets time out from being a parent to work or sort out all the other things going on in her life without passing on stress and anxiety to her child. Life is complicated. It's not easy. But the happier and more relaxed you can make yourself, through whatever means, the happier your child will be.
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