Article published in The Age/My Career.
Jennifer Dalitz is a mum, farmer, business consultant and founder/SheEO™ of Sphinxx.com.au for women in leadership; She is also the author of Little Wins for Working Women.
Jen Dalitz
How to maintain a career and stay sane…
I never imagined I'd be writing an article for working parents. My life was full enough as it was, and there's never a "right time" for a career woman to start a family. Yet here we are. So is it possible to have it all, or is that just a pipedream?
In my pregnancy I was open to the idea of taking a career break for a year or two, but by the time my baby was four weeks old it was clear that wouldn't be the best thing for any of us! I've learned that as a working parent your career can not only survive, but thrive. Here are a few of the things that have helped me maintain my sanity and my career:
- Ditch the downers. Being a mum is the hardest job I've ever taken on: Managing million dollar budgets and hundreds of workers is a walk in the park by comparison. So I knew from the get go I couldn't do this on my own. Ethan's fabulous preschool, my gorgeous family and friends and my cleaner have been pivotal supporters! And as for those friends and colleagues who weren't supporters… I learned to avoid them at all costs!
- Focus on what matters most. We're all different, but the point is to first get clear about what matters most to you. Only then can you clearly communicate it to your family, your friends and your boss. What matters most for my husband and me is that our entire family is happy, cared for and intellectually challenged. A career break was not going to deliver these outcomes to any of us - including my son who enjoys the stimulation of preschool just as I enjoy the challenge of my work!
- Don't throw the baby out with the bath water! If your pre-children job doesn't fit with what matters most, your first instinct may be to find a new job, but first, consider what you'd be leaving behind and what a new job might mean: Six months learning curve with possible overtime and increased stress. So could you do your old job part time, as a job share or with more flexible working arrangements? It may not be your most productive or rewarding time, but it will keep up the momentum and ease you back in.
- Play to your strengths. There's no one more efficient in the office than that parent who ploughs through work in double quick time to be out of the door and at the daycare centre before closing time! There's no overtime; no long coffee breaks; often no breaks at all... perfect in a GFC for keeping productivity up and business overheads down! I was amazed at how my own productivity picked up. For the first time I truly embraced the 80:20 rule. I can't believe the impact this has had on my business: Productively I'm twice the woman I used to be!
- Adopt a "need to know" attitude. I'm aware that although my son is the apple of my eye, my colleagues may not share my delight or have interest in my parenting dramas! If you have a sick child and can't make a meeting or have to leave in time for daycare or it's a non daycare day, simply suggest an alternative time. Going into the details of parenting problems only perpetuates the stereotypes about working parents.
- Be kind to yourself. It's very difficult for working parents to find time for to wind down. Outside of work the guilt factor drives you to spend every free moment with your family. Suddenly you come last. But taking good care of yourself - physically, emotionally and intellectually - is essential for maintaining your resilience. You'll make a huge difference by eating well, exercising and finding a little window of 'me time' every week.
- Enjoy the journey. I distinctly remember the first time my son smiled, because it happened when I thought things couldn't get any harder and was a pivotal moment. As a working parent you might not be able to stay back to meet a deadline; promotions may be fewer and farther between; and you'll have to deal with challenges that are simply out of kilter with any career plan. But those smiles are worth more than you'll earn in your lifetime, so enjoy them while you can.
CareforKids.com.au®
Care For Kids Internet Services Pty Ltd
ABN 55 104 145 735
PO Box 543 Balmain NSW 2041
privacy policy contact us