If you have toddlers heading in to their first moments in childcare or maybe just transitioning to school, you'll soon come to realise that their day goes from frantically fitting in 415 words before breakfast to almost having to drag a sentence from their mouth when you pick them up.
Never fear, short or even single word answers are normal and a lot of the time, that's because they're just exhausted and they are yet to digest their day.
You just need to give your child time. You can even ask closed ended questions for the meantime, that way, you can get an insight into their day, and wait until they are ready to spill out much more interesting and valuable information.
Alas, you might just find them ready to explode at bedtime with a detailed response of all the happenings from the playground.
There are ways around this phenomenon and that is mastering the art of asking open-ended questions and discovering the right time to ask them. Don't try asking too many at once in the car, maybe wait a little while. That might mean that you chat while preparing an afternoon snack or over dinner, depending on the age of your child.
Wait too long and you risk missing their memory window – tricky little things kids can be.
About their day
A lot of educators subscribe to in app technology and send photos and updates about the work that goes on throughout the day which is fortunate for us as it gives us a little snippet to start with – thank you, technology!
Here are some examples of open ended questions you can ask:
- ‘Tell me about the painting or craft you did today'
- ‘What was the most interesting part of your day?'
- ‘If you could change one thing about your day, what would it be and why?'
- ‘What is something you did today that you'd love to do every day?'
- ‘What is the funniest thing that happened today?'
- What's your favourite thing to do when you're outside?
About the books you're reading
Reading, understanding and enjoying the books we engage with is important and so many children just love sitting and listening at story time. If you have a nightly reading routine, dig a little deeper into their thoughts and ask kids questions – you might be surprised at what they come out with.
- ‘Looking at the cover, what do you think the story is about?'
- ‘What might happen next?'
- ‘What do you think you would do if that happened to you?'
Conversation starters
Some parents might find they have a child who talks a little less than most (even worse, some tend to give a one word answer) and if that's you, looking for ways to get specific answers and keep them talking can be tricky. A few conversation starters for the end of your day, car ride or just for fun!
- ‘If you could rename fruits, what would you call them?'
- ‘If you had a parrot, what would you teach it to say?'
- ‘If you had a magic power, which one would it be and why?'
- If your toys could talk, what would they say?
- Would you rather take a shower or have a bath?
Asking open ended questions is an interactive method that helps children discover more meaning from their experiences and opens their minds to various possibilities. It helps stimulates their thought process, language skills and even help them with solving problems.
Don't forget, your children want to hear all about your day too - if everything else fails, have a chat to them about a moment in your day that was ‘amazing' and ask if they have something to share about theirs too.
And don't settle with a closed question, ask an open ended one, such as what's his favourite part of his day, and you just might be surprised with how exciting or interesting the answer could be.
